I'm not your "Female"

Alright y'all, today I’m here to discuss the use of the word female in place of woman/en and why it is Misogynistic and degrading. I am fully expecting for some men to respond with “it’s just a word” or “there are bigger issues we need to worry about right now”. However, it does not affect you so it will take longer for you to see why it is never just a word for me. I am always correcting men on not to say Female when speaking about a woman and they are always met with confusion. I am tired of reminding them so this blog post will be my last time. *It is to be noted that this is in reference to the use of the word in relation to black women mostly*

First and foremost…. FEMALE IS AN ADJECTIVE. It is grammatically wrong and awkward for you to use female if you are not describing anything. If you are saying “ I want a female like that” you are not stating what you are trying to describe. A FEMALE WHAT?? Dog, horse, groundhog? I just know it cannot be a female human, because the word you are looking for already exists, and it is WOMAN. You may call it slang and interchangeable for women but you are in fact wrong. Whether intentional or unintentional, it is misogynistic and dehumanizes women. You are reducing them to an adjective that never gives them full meaning or personhood. When you use female as a noun, the subject you are talking about is erased, it is almost as if you are going out of your way to say female when woman or any of the synonyms that grants us personhood exists. Us women have had to fight hard to be seen as more than a body or commodity and deserve the respect of being called by our proper names.

Second of all, YOU NEVER casually hear men referred to as males, and that is because of patriarchy and the placement/power men have in society over women. They have earned the right to not be reduced to their reproductive system or be seen as an object, whereas, women still to this day are trying to be more than child bearers. In Fact, the definition of female goes as follows,

adjective

1. of or denoting the sex that can bear offspring or produce eggs, distinguished biologically by the production of gametes (ova) which can be fertilized by male gametes.

Historically, Black women could not participate in the idea of motherhood because the ability to reproduce did not mean the ability to claim. Being reduced to their abilities as reproducers, focus is placed on their qualities as an object and shifted away from the personal. Furthermore, the use of female helps to perpetuate this same idea and take away from everything that is human about women. It is not hard to simply call us by what we are.. Women. They do not mean the same thing and it’s time we understand that. It is problematic enough to disregard the feelings of black women and feel that there is nothing wrong with its use “just because we don’t like it”. As I have said in my previous blog, black women are often met with arguments when it comes to them speaking up on things that AFFECT them. Me telling you I don’t like the term should be enough, I should not have to list reasons as to why it is wrong and degrading. However, I am writing anyways because there are also many women who do not like the term based on it sounding degrading, but cannot form the words to describe why it is upsetting (much like me before I started looking up the use of female and speaking with other women).

From my experience in conversations and interactions with men, often, but not always, the use of the term females come from the belief that women are inferior or from a place of internalized hate/dislike and disregard for women. When you say things like “Man stop acting like a female” to one of your homeboys, you are suggesting that women are weak and you are also spreading your toxic masculinity around to belittle women. Because not only are you diminishing them to an object, but a fragile and powerless one at that. Men that usually respect and like women will have no problem seeing how the use of the term is problematic and will have no problem unlearning the use of the word after being told how it makes women feel. It is the men who have trouble trusting women and their judgement on certain interactions that will have a hard time seeing the problem with this word. If you choose not to change and unlearn things rooted in patriarchy then please.. STAY FAR AWAY FROM ME.